What's in a Name?

Growing up, as early as the tender diaper years, my brother decided that he would nickname me to something other than my real name. It wasn’t that sweet, little girl angel-like name that maybe other babies or girls get. It just wasn’t that nice. He not only was so happy with himself for causing many others to adopt this new name, I also bore the brunt of seeing it handwritten on envelopes during my adolescence arriving through the USPS (the P is for Public, read: Public Humiliation) from as far away as Maine and Guam. The Nickname fortunately, and mostly, dissipated when my parents relocated us from the Midwest to the Southwest. It popped up occasionally upon returns for family trips.

During a short and ill-fated marriage in ’89 (after being pursued for 4 years, go figure), my name was subject to – well, just being left out. My brother-in-law at the time sent his wedding invitation to "us" addressed: Mr. John Doe, and Guest. Hello? Do you remember attending – being IN - our wedding just last year? I didn’t even get a direct apology.

As a stepmom, my name gets reduced to mostly meaningless add-ons, thus the "step", like second step in a series of two (read: last place), or second wife. I have lived through the scratch outs of my name to be replaced with The Mother’s and the new hubby. Then why did you have me come in and sign the permission slip anyway? And there was the time that I added the spouse’s name to my checking account (of 8 years I might add; I felt a bit possessive – the checking account, not the spouse) and the envelopes came to the house with his name on them, totally omitting mine. What’s up with that? And mortgage statements – I do remember signing my name at closing too.

More recently (see previous post on San Jose), my newest brother-in-law (what’s with brother-in-laws?) and sister-in-law have managed to totally skirt around the whole name thing by not acknowledging I exist. I think a card arrived once without even a Mrs. in the address line. The other day someone called me Mrs. Hanson. I looked around wondering who they were talking to because, yes, that was the first time I had been addressed by that name.

And you know when you get an email with a bunch of names, and how it is supposed to read in the list?

"Adam and Eve" <adamandeve@edenmail.com>

I am on a group email list where once again I have lost my identity; the only thing left is my email address. I’d like to think my address is pretty straightforward:   donnahanson@mymail.com.
So, if I haven’t been neglected enough, my self-image scarred for a lifetime, I can’t even claim my own email address:

"Spouse and Stepdaughter" <donnahanson@mymail.com>

Comments

[Stephanie]

So you actually got an e-mail addressed to "Spouse and Stepdaughter"? Unreal. I love how our society is moving away from even the appearance of being polite. Ugh.

[JR]

Check this out, though,
"...and the sheep hear His voice; and He calls His own sheep by name and leads them out..." (John 10.3).

You ARE known - by name!
J